Level by Scott Ginn (EssGee) (May, 2007)
Walkthrough by Harrie Laudie and edited by Scott Ginn.
The music is from "Get Smart", an old TV spy spoof. Go forward and push open the doors. Follow the tunnel and doors either open for you or you have to push the doors open. Finally enter a large room and see a shallow pool in front of you. A cartoon Magnus pops up and then descends into the floor. Wait and shoot two large cockroaches that approach you. Get into the water and move the blocks from the corners onto the patterns in the middle of the shallow pool floor. Save the game before moving anything. The north-east block goes to the north-east tile of the central pattern. Repeat for the other three blocks. When placed correctly, a door opens in the east wall next to the shallow pool. If you have to move a tile off the pattern and then replace it, the door does not open. Reload and try again. When done, enter the tunnel and pull down a wall switch.
Exit the tunnel and go west. Wait and shoot another cockroach. Approach the ‘No Flaming Allowed’ sign. Quickly run over each of the flashing tiles whilst avoiding Monty Python type feet that drop from the ceiling. When all three have dropped, a door opens in the west wall. Enter the tunnel and pull down a wall switch.
Exit the tunnel and go south. Approach Jackie’s Vegetable Patch, and vegetables pop out from the flashing smiley floor tiles. Only step on the two green cucumbers when the cucumbers are down. A door opens in the west wall. Enter the tunnel and pull down a wall switch. You will hear some doors open in the distance.
Go east and see a walkway above you that leads to a door for later. Go south through the open doors and pick up a Bottle of Wine. Turn around and shoot the flying pig. Now it’s time to go Puddle dancing with Kris. Enter the doors again and see a deadly lava floor with safe ‘yellow water’ pools. Jump into the four pools. Start with pool #1 in the south-west corner. Jump back to the safe ledge. Jump into the pool #2, pool #3, and pool #4 in order. Two bathroom doors open in the east corridor. Go there and enter the south room to shoot a cockroach. Enter the north room to shoot a cockroach. Crouch down to pick up the Staff Key from the floor near the chair in the north-west corner. Return to the Puddle Dancing room and go to the south-west corner and use the Staff Key to open the door.
Enter the door and run down the tunnel. You see a floating vehicle called the Purple Pal. You can only mount from the right side. There is also no reverse that I found. You can get stuck in corners and dead-ends. Either drive it to the end of the tunnel or ignore it and run to the end of the tunnel. The ‘Pal’ serves only to get you around the level more quickly. A cartoon Magnus pops up in the doorway and then descends into the floor. After that, you will find steps going north. Run up the steps and see a statue to the north. There are two corridors in this area.
Take the west corridor to the end and enter the Chat Room. Ignore the babble and go to the west side of the room. Look to the ceiling for a hole. Back flip onto the slope and jump forward to grab the ladder in the hole. Climb up into a small control room. Go to the east wall and pull down a switch. Safety drop back into the Chat Room. Go to the north wall and enter the newly opened door.
Turn around and wait to shoot two cockroaches. Go north and past a closed Smut Room door. Go north to a junction. To the right is the closed Smiley Room door and a theatre for later. Take the left branch and follow it to enter the Target Range. The door closes behind you. Jump the ledge and go west. Magnus pops up and then descends into the floor. Jump into the south-west corner and pull the switch behind the targets. You get a cut scene of a corridor. The door is open again so exit the Target Range. Return to the Chat Room and go east down the long corridor.
Enter the room to the south. This is the G-spot Bar. Go west and shoot a cockroach. Jump onto the bar and pick up two Bottles of Wine. Hop down and shoot a flying pig. You can press the button on the east wall if you want (it’s just for fun). Exit the room and go east and pass the Lara statue. In the next corridor pick up a Chocolate Box from the table. Ignore the two side tunnels for now and continue to the end of the corridor. This corridor was closed by large doors earlier but were opened during the last cut scene.
Go behind the south-east column and pull down a jump switch. You get a cut scene of the rooms to the north in this corridor. It also shows Bex’s office with a large table. Pull down the unusually shaped wall switch, called Brass Monkey Meter, next to the window in the east wall. The Badgers will sing and dance and Magnus pops up again. Just have patience and the cut scene will eventually end. Go north to the room with the fires on the statues. Go west to the room with the table. Enter the open glass door to the right to enter the LH staff offices.
Enter the first room to the left. Notice the picture of the Terminator on the wall. This is EssGee’s office. Pull down the switch in the south-west corner and the door opens. Enter the door and follow the short tunnel to pick up the revolver. When you exit the door, the Terminator will appear. Do not shoot him but the Terminator will shoot the several cockroaches in the area. (Note: if you shoot the Terminator, he will turn against you and will try to kill your Lara. The terminator is invincible in this mode. The only way to kill him is to run over him with the Purple Pal.)
Exit and go north to Lucas’s office with the Lara posters. Hop onto the back cabinets and pick up a souvenir - Lucas’s Lara.
Exit and go north to Torry and Cher’s office with the Wonder Woman and Cat Woman posters. Hop onto the back cabinets and pick up Tor's Naughty Video and a Lit Cigarette.
Exit and go north to the next room. There is nothing to pick up in the kitchenette.
Exit and see a door and a keycard reader in the north wall. There is another keycard reader in the east corridor. Go south and enter CC’s office on the left which has a horse statue. Crawl into the crawl space in the south-east corner and pick up the laser sight.
Exit and go south to Litepulsar’s office with the Stargate SG-1 poster. Hop onto the back cabinets and pick up the Elysian Fields CD.
Exit and go south to Pip’s office with the butterfly wall cases. Go to the south-east corner and pull down the Brass Monkey Meter. You get a cut scene showing a room with chains. Exit this room and go south back to the room with the table. Go east and south to return to the two tunnels that you ignored earlier.
Enter the south tunnel and take the Pain tunnel to the right. Go west and find the room with chains from the cut scene. Pick up revolver ammo from the floor. Pick up a Staff Key from the whip on the floor. Exit this room and go east to the Pleasure tunnel. Use the revolver and laser sight to shoot the blue lock at the top of the door in the south-east corner. Go to the back of the bathroom and pick up the Edge of Human CD from the floor in front of the toilet. Exit this room and return to the large corridor.
Go west back to the Chat Room and enter the north door again. Go north and take the right branch. You may see the Terminator stuck at the door. Go north and push open the doors to the Preview Theatre. Run to the front and place the video in the video player at the wall. You can stay for the movie or just leave and go to the left. The Terminator will shoot another cockroach for you. Enter the Smiley Room and go to the right side. Follow the wall and pull down a jump switch in the middle of the west wall. Shoot a cockroach or wait and the Terminator will shoot it. Follow the wall to exit this room.
Go south and west and into the open door of the Smut Room. Shoot two cockroaches and go to the south wall. Pull down the Brass Monkey Meter on the table. You get a cut scene of a door opening on the walkway in the starting room. Exit this room and go south to the chat room. Go east into the corridor and go south down the steps to the Purple Pal (if you left it there). Drive or run back to the starting room and be careful of the lava and water. Climb the pole that has been raised from the floor and backflip onto the walkway. Enter the open door of Magnus’s room.
Magnus pops up and then descends into the floor. Go to the north-east corner and pick up the Warning Card from the floor. You get a cut scene of the Torture Room door and a keycard reader. Go to the south-east corner and pick up a Chocolate Box and another souvenir - Magnus's Comics. Go to the north-west corner and pick up a Chocolate Box. Exit this room and return through the corridors to the room with the statue at the top of the steps.
Go east and take the north tunnel that you ignored earlier. It is opposite the Pleasure and Pain tunnel. Use the Warning Card to open the door of the Torture Room. The door closes behind you. Pick up the flares on the floor between the benches with the barbed wire. The second metal cabinet to the right in the south wall is movable. Pull out the cabinet and push it aside. Enter the alcove and pick up the Lab Code. The tunnel in the west wall leads to a slope and the deadly ‘Banned’ room. The entrance door has opened so exit the room.
Go back to the large corridor. Go east and north back to Bex’s Office with the table. Enter the open door in the north wall again. Go to the end of the corridor and go to the right. Use the Lab Code card to open the door. Enter Elvis’s laboratory and hop onto the lab bench at the west wall. Pick up a flask of Chemicals. Go to the closed door in the north-east. Combine the Chemicals and Lit Cigarette to make Oh-Oh. Place it on the west wall receptacle in front of the door. Wait for an explosion and the door opens. Enter the tunnel and pick up the Beta Password at the rear of the room. Turn around and shoot a flying pig.
Exit this room and go to the right to find the Beta Testing Room. Use the Beta Password card to open the door. Enter the room and shoot a cockroach if the Terminator has left the area. Go to the north-west corner and pull up into the crawl space in the west wall. Follow the crawl space and pick up the Shadow of the Wind CD. Get out of the crawl space and go south to the room with the table. Loop around to the right and use the Staff Key in the key lock on the north wall. The glass door opens to your left. Enter the room and place Bex’s three CDs in the empty display plaques. The glass doors open at the steps next to you.
Go up the steps and shoot two cockroaches. Notice a key lock on the east wall and continue north. Go west into a control room. Go west and then north to see a cabinet at the north wall. Pull the cabinet back and go behind it. Push open the doors to Uziguy’s closet. Reach into the mouth hole and get the Staff Key. Exit the room and go back to the key lock. Use the Staff Key to open the glass doors behind you. Enter Bex’s recording studio and go west. Pick up a green Lettuce Head from the floor. Go south and stand between the pedestal with the crown and the green dress dummy. Place the Lettuce Head on the crown. You get a cut scene of Lara in Bex’s green dress with the lettuce on her head and the level ends.
You can examine the other short cut scenes from the main menu at your leisure.